Let’s face it: we all want to make more money, preferably without grinding away at a boring 9-to-5. The internet is flooded with “easy money” ideas promising financial freedom and the ability to “retire your husband” (yes, that’s a real pitch). But how many of these actually work? Spoiler alert: not many. Let’s break down some of the most popular (and hilarious) ways people try—and fail—to make extra cash.
1. MLMs: Where Dreams Go to Die (And Take Your Wallet With Them)
Let’s start with the heavyweight champion of financial disappointment: Multi-Level Marketing (MLMs). You know the names: Amway, Herbalife, Mary Kay, Young Living, Pampered Chef, and even Beachbody (until recently). These companies pitch the dream of financial freedom, luxury vacations, and retiring your husband (seriously, that’s a selling point).
But here’s the cold, hard truth: According to the FTC, 99.6% of people involved in MLMs lose money. That means only 0.4% of participants actually make a profit. Let that sink in. You’re more likely to get struck by lightning twice than to make a living in an MLM.
Why? Because MLMs focus more on recruiting people into your “downline” than actually selling products. You end up buying loads of inventory yourself, hoping to resell it, but often, it just gathers dust in your garage.
And let’s not forget the motivational Zoom calls, where you’re guilt-tripped into thinking you’re broke because you’re not “hustling hard enough.” One such pep talk might sound like this:
“Every time you don’t send an invite because of what your dad’s mom’s sister’s dog walker thinks about you… WHO CARES, BITCH?! How bad do you want it?!”
Yikes.
2. Paid Online Surveys: Big Time Commitment, Tiny Paycheck
We’ve all been tempted. “Make money from home by sharing your opinion!” they say. But here’s the deal: most online surveys pay $1 to $2 per survey, and you can’t even cash out until you hit a minimum threshold—usually $25 or more. So, you’re stuck taking endless surveys about toothpaste brands just to make enough for a fast-food meal.
And oh, some of these sites? They’ll gladly take your personal information and sell it to third parties. So, while you’re dreaming of buying a yacht, they’re selling your email to spam bots. Win-win! (But not for you.)
3. Social Media “Hacks”: Buying Bots for Clout
“Want to grow your business fast? Buy followers!” Sounds tempting, right? But fake followers are just that—fake. They’re not buying your homemade candles or signing up for your wellness coaching. Plus, social media platforms are cracking down on fake engagement. Best case? You lose money. Worst case? You get banned.
Bottom line: Authentic content and real engagement are the only sustainable ways to build a following. Sorry, no shortcuts here.
4. Online Gambling: The House Always Wins
Online casinos rake in a staggering $65 billion a year. And if you think you’re going to be the next big winner, think again. Around 23 million Americans end up in debt due to gambling, and 20% of all bankruptcies are linked to gambling problems.
Average debt? Women rack up around $15,000, while men average $55,000. That’s not pocket change.
So, unless you’re cool with maxing out your credit cards on virtual slot machines, maybe keep your wallet in your pocket.
5. “Work From Home” Scams: Stuffing Envelopes and Broken Promises
Envelope stuffing, data entry, mystery shopping—sounds easy, right? Except most of these jobs are fake. Scammers post “too good to be true” jobs, charge you upfront for training or supplies, and then… disappear.
Pro tip: If a job requires you to pay them before you get paid, it’s a scam. No exceptions.
6. Clinical Trials: Risky Business
Getting paid to test new meds sounds like a quick payday, but clinical trials come with serious risks. Sure, you might earn a few thousand dollars, but you could also end up as the next “unfortunate side effect” in a medical journal.
Plus, some trials keep you locked up for days—windowless rooms, weird diets, and endless blood draws. Suddenly, that $3,000 doesn’t seem so sweet.
So, How Do You Actually Make Money?
Look, we’re not here to crush your dreams. But real money-making takes real effort. If it sounds too good to be true, it probably is. Want to make extra cash? Here are some solid, scam-free ideas:
• Freelancing: Become an Interpreter and work for yourself. Writing, graphic design, web development—whatever your skill is, there’s a market for it.
• Gig Work: Uber, DoorDash, TaskRabbit. It’s not glamorous, but it’s legit.
• Selling Handmade Products: Etsy or local markets are great places to sell crafts, jewelry, or art. Start something local that you can sell! I did it.
• Teaching or Tutoring: Got expertise in something? Share it. People pay for lessons in everything from math to guitar.
At the end of the day, there’s no magic money tree. But with hard work (and avoiding shady MLM Zoom calls), you can build something real.
Now, go forth and make that money—the smart way.